i did just write a whole massive great fantastic blog entry but the darn thing never saved as i accidently clicked on my site stats whilst it was saving. im officially gutted, but ill re write a quicker version of it and although it may not be as good as the last one i will waste my time re writing something i just spent ages writing!
anyway, i feel like im getting better, i still panic over eating foods and stuff but i feel like im a lot more normal. i dont know if thats due to motivation or the medication i am on but whatever it is, it seams to be weorking. i can go out now without panicking too much, i still sleep in with my mum but i havent even thought of trying to sleep in my own bed yet so i dont particularly think that is a problem.
anyway, i think 2013 will be my year, i want to get over anxiety and depressionand above all conquer it! i will be a winner and a fighter and i will clear this mental illenss for good and i hope to never see it return again! as soon as that clock turns to 00:00 on december the 31st, new years eve, thats when my life begins, i have so much to look forward too in 2013 i wont let anxiety or depression drag me away from it!
i have study leave from school and will finally be able ti start sleeping at my boyfriends house which i havent been able to do, i get to sit all of my exams and have a 4 month break from school before starting again in september for sixth form, ill be taking all the subjects i enjoy and for my boyfriends birthday ill be buying him a lovely present he will smile massively at when he opens it! i will find a job and go clothes shopping for smart and classy outfits to impress for sixth form, i will start sixth form and say good bye to all of the old friends that dragged me down and tried to knock my confidence, ill say goodbye to all the druggies that sit on the street corners cracking it up every friday and saturday night, ill start a new life with new friends that will take me places, ill go to lots of parties in sky high heels and marvelous dresses that will cling to my curves effortlessly, ill eat more and put onw eight and take my driving lessons, ill pass my test and achieve so many great things in dance, i will do dance shows and get good grades in all ym subjects after studying them for months in depth at home and at school. its just going to be my year. im not going to let anything ruin it, and even if at the start of 2013 i am still fighting anxiety and depression i will get through it, i will keep fighting until it detaches itself from my body and never returns!
ive never wrote and entry this positive before and im so happy to finally do it!
maybe i will get better, maybe everything will get better, maybe! the future is bright!
baileydancer117 